panzuda's Diaryland Diary

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the hysterical thought

im just remembering all of the times i couldn’t breathe because of sickness.

when i was diagnosed with asthma i remember trying to push a ball in a tube with my breath and just coughing in a nasty way. the person doing the test seemed sympathetic or sarcastic depending on how i remember it.

there was the bad time. with all the medicine.

then years of just telling people that’s just how i am. just someone who sneezes and coughs and wheezes.

the bad pneumonia with all the awful drugs.

i feel afraid for the people dying by drowning now. I’m afraid a little for myself (but feeling better now that i have the means to stay inside) i hope everyone who can breathe stays breathing without pain for as long as possible.

21:50 - 16.03.20

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